Down, BUT NOT OUT!

The back half of this week has been, without question, the toughest part of the journey so far.

Round two of chemo hit different. Solid food became impossible, and even water felt like climbing a mountain. On top of that, the radiation side effects that began to show up last week my taste is gone, saliva thick and relentless. Layer chemo on top of that, and it’s just brutal. There is no other way to put it. 

There are moments when you realize this isn’t something you can always push through. Cancer doesn’t always let you fight, it demands that you surrender, even if just for a moment. But I haven’t given up. Not even close. 

Today, I managed to get a few protein shakes down. That might not seem like much, but to me it’s a win. Right now, progress doesn’t look like leaps, it looks like sips. And I’m learning to honor every one of them.

This isn’t a sprint it’s a long, uneven marathon. And I’m still in it. There’s something about reaching this point that makes everything feel more real. The adrenaline is gone. The light feels dimmer some days. But I still find something each day to hold on to.

I’m not losing hope. I’m just beginning to understand the depth of the fight.

When the days are hardest, the love from my army reminds me why I keep going. One brutal week doesn’t define the whole journey.

We don’t have a choice but to keep moving. So we do.

Week 5, bring it on! 

— JD / JK


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Week 1

First, I want to say thank you. The amount of love, messages, support, and strength I’ve felt from friends and family has meant more than I can put into words. It’s made the hard days easier and the good days even more meaningful. I never realized how much an encouraging text or a simple “thinking of you” could lift me up until now. So thank you  After week one of treatment being completed I can officially say, chemo sucks. More specifically, Cisplatin sucks, which is the specific type of chemo I am on. It’s rough, the nausea, the fatigue, the fog. I knew treatment wouldn’t be easy, but chemo has a way of knocking you down in ways you can’t quite prepare for. You push through it because you have to, but it’s no joke. On the flip side radiation has been manageable so far. I know it’ll get tougher, but for now, I’m feeling grateful that it hasn’t hit me as hard. One day at a time. If you’re reading this and you’re scared to go in and get checked don’t be. I feel incredibly luc...
Read more

A win week!

This week felt like a small win and around here, we celebrate the wins. After days of feeling completely wiped from chemo, I finally started to turn the corner on Sunday. The fog lifted a bit. The nausea eased up and things started to feel manageable again. To top it off, my blood work came back all normal. After everything my body’s been through these past few weeks, that was a huge relief. It gave me a little boost of confidence that this fight is moving in the right direction. AND I even got out on the golf course. Twice. Once with my buddies and once with my son-in-law. Just being out there laughing and swinging, it felt great to have a sense of “normal”. I know not every week will be like this one. But this week was good. And I’m learning to take each good day as it comes and to be really, deeply grateful for it. Thanks for sticking with me. Week 2 done, bring on week 3! -JD/JK
Read more

Halfway In Sight

This week brought a new layer to the journey, radiation side effects have started to show up, and I’ve officially lost my sense of taste, a lot of foods have an awful after taste. So I’m learning what I can and can’t get down. It’s a strange thing, eating without flavor, but I know it’s just part of the process, it’s not a pleasure to eat anymore but I know I have to. Even with the hard stuff, I still feel incredibly blessed. The support, the prayers, the check-ins they carry me more than people probably realize. Looking ahead, it’s a big week. Another round of chemo on Wednesday, and I know what that brings and I’m not looking forward to it. But once I get through this one, I’ll be over the halfway hump. That’s a milestone I’ve had my eye on since the beginning. It’s going to get tougher before it gets easier, I know that. But I’m doing my best to find one thing each day that gives me purpose or keeps me going. Some days it’s a walk, a laugh, a good conversation. Some days it’s ju...
Read more